What to do with myself?

Monday was a big day in our house...the boys first day of school at Ruamrudee International School. The boys did great being dropped off at their classes. No tears or anything! (Not even from me!) The boys have to be at school at 7:10, which is a very early morning. They get a taxi around 6:40 to head off to school. Britton and I pick Lincoln up around 12:00. He would be able to stay for the whole day, but I think 7:10-2:40 for a 4 year old is a little much. He is only missing rest time, stories & a snack. Greyson comes home with Ben around 4:00.

Now, what do I think? Well, to be honest I am having a little bit of a difficult time with this transition and probably not for the reasons most parents have trouble with the first few days of school. When you decide to homeschool, you have already gone against what everyone thinks as "normal". You have had to defend your self and show that you can give your child the very best education that they could receive. Since most people are skeptical of homeschooling it makes you put your all into their school day to prove that you are not "screwing" up your child. My last 6 1/2 years have been devoted to coming up with the very best that I could for the boys. I had complete control of what was taught and loved that they could tell Ben everything they did for the day to him at dinner. I was able to monitor who they were playing with during the day and teach to their own learning styles. I feel like I gave in to the pressure.

I know that I had to take a look at the whole picture and the boys staying with just me was not the best for them (in Thailand), but now they get up at 5:50 am, have homework, cannot tell me what they did during the day, and not have much family time. I know we will all adjust, but I am hoping this was the best decision.

But with this change leaves a lot of free time for me that I am really not used too. Most would love this, but I am feeling very sad about it. I miss the boys, seeing what they are learning and the excitement they have when they "get it". I did really enjoy my day with Britton today though. We took a 15 minute walk to the lake, walked around, and the got some ice cream. I figured I would burn it off on the walk home!! It was 88 degrees and VERY humid today, so I am sure I just sweated the ice cream off!!

I am hoping with this new "free"time I will be able to learn Thai, make some new friends, maybe a massage or pedicure every once in a while, and learn to just enjoy this new phase in my life.