Moving Forward...and a little lesson on posting on Facebook

I think it is time for a little heart to heart.  I got myself into a bit of an discussion after I shared an article about the Five Most Depressing cities in America. The last city we lived in was in that top five. Many came to defend the city, while others agreed with the article.  I thought I may need to clarify why I found this article so interesting.

If you knew me before we decided to move across the world, you would not have put me on any adventurous list.  I went to college an hour away from my hometown and after I got married, I moved to the largest city in our area, which is 45 minutes from my hometown.  I never saw myself moving anywhere else, except maybe to the suburbs in the future. I had only been out of the country  four times, which really did not appeal to me and I had never been further west of Illinois, or ever even been to the New England States.

We were a single income family trying to make it work.  I am sure I had seasonal depression, because every year after Christmas, I would have a breakdown about where we were in life.  I hated the cold and felt like I spent way too much time in doors with my three very active boys.  I was exhausted from being a stay at home/ homeschooling mom....needing to cook, clean, run errands, never getting a vacation or being able to really vacation, and not even really having the extra to go out to eat just to get a break from cooking.

The city we lived in did have some really great things to offer us.  They have one of the best zoos in America, a hands on science center, wonderful metroparks, playgrounds all over the city, great YMCA programs, and a wonderful homeschool group that kept us very busy.  But I couldn't help feeling depressed when I thought about where we lived.  I looked around and thought, "This is it.  This is all I will ever see."  Then, I started to panic a little and we knew we needed a change.  I will write a post about our decision to move another day, but here is the thing, I was not happy in our town.  It did not matter that our town had a long list of great things to offer, I was not happy.

Both pictures are before our move. I look tired and like I am forcing my smiles.



Since we have moved to Thailand, my attitude about life is just all around better.  I do not feel depressed anymore and I am excited about our future.  I do not feel stuck.  A friend of mine mentioned when she saw me on our visit last summer, that I had a whole new aura of peace and calmness to me.  She said I just looked happier.  And I really am.  Now, let me say that after living in Thailand for almost  three years, there are days that I am absolutely bored out of my mind.  I desperately miss playgrounds and wonderful museums and zoos for my kids.  Thailand was not a cure all for how I was feeling, but it did rescue me from the feeling I had in my chest about our life back home.  I could finally breathe and have peace in my life.

 Looking and feeling a lot more at peace since the move.

Moving did come with heartache from leaving our families and frustrations of navigating a new country and culture, but it is something I will never ever regret.  After I saw that article, I wondered if part of the reason I was feeling depressed where I lived in the States was due to the fact that it was listed as one of the most depressing cities to live in.  I'm sure I cannot be the only one that feels that way. I know the article was mostly based on job growth, but what struck me was the percent of people who were optimistic.  Only 35.2 % compared to Provo, Utah where 76.9 % of people are optimistic.

So, I posted the article and took some heat from it.  But, one thing I found very interesting, was that every person who defended the article had since moved away from that city, either to a suburb, small town, or larger city in our state.  No one actually lived in the city I was talking about.  I was not complaining about the whole entire state.  And honestly, when I think of moving back to that particular city and our old home, I start to get a knot in my stomach.  I am not really sure why, but I do know that I do not want the life I had before our move. I want to be really happy.  That might be living in Ohio again or maybe not.

I am so happy we live in a country where we are able to move freely.  No one has to be stuck in their current life and no one has to settle and be unhappy.  We are free to move and choose a life that will make us truly happy.  Again, I am very sorry if anyone felt I was ripping on our town. That was not my intention. This was just an article I agreed with. I am looking forward to seeing where our future leads us.  We really have no clue where we could end up!